chapter 18
CHAPTER 18
Responsibilities of the Head of the
Household
O ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire
whose
fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and)
severe, who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive from
God, but do (precisely) what they are commanded. [Holy Quran: Tahrim
66: 6]
Protect
Yourself and Your Family From the Fire of Hell
A
verse in chapter Tahrim places an extremely heavy responsibility on the head of
household. If all the people, especially those responsible for their wife and
children, paid close attention to this verse, then a large portion of family
problems would be solved. There would be no more tension or insecurity in the
house and all things would get settled easily.
O
ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men
and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who flinch not
(from executing) the Commands they receive from God, but do (precisely) what
they are commanded. [Holy Quran: Tahrim 66: 6]
It
is the responsibility of the head of the household to guide his family members
towards unity, faith in the Hereafter, fear of God's punishment, piety, Islamic
behavior; and to provide the means for their development, education and
training. Hence he shall protect them from the torture of the Hereafter. Take
note that the Quran says that men are the fuel for the Fire of Hell in the above
verse. It is clearly understood from the Holy Quran that the roots of the
torture in the Hereafter are sins; and the nature of crimes and their punishment
is the same. As opposed to crimes in this world which have a different form of
punishment, like demanding fines for driving rule violations; in the Herafter
crimes are human acts, but their fine is not financial. The nature of property
and action is different; however, in the order of the Creator, the nature of
crimes and punishment is the same. This means that the penalty for a criminal in
the
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Hereafter is the crime itself which shall blaze out of the criminal like
fire.When man commits any crime, be it a criminal action, a financial crime, a
moral or spiritual crime, he has accepted the fire, which will appear and burn
him in the Hereafter. Many people commit lots of sins for much of their lives
and leave no part of their body pure from committing sins. In fact they have
stored up much fire within themselves. This fire shall physically appear in the
Hereafter when the curtains are drawn aside and the unseen becomes visible, and
it shall enslave its owner forever. Please note the following two verses from
the Glorious Quran.
Those
who conceal God's revelations in the Book, and purchase for them a miserable
profit, - they swallow into themselves naught but Fire; God will not address
them on the Day of Resurrection, nor purify them: grievous will be their
penalty. [Holy Quran: Baqara: 2:174] Those who unjustly eat up the property of
orphans, eat up a Fire into their own bodies: they will soon be enduring a
blazing Fire! [Holy Quran: Nisaa: 4:10]
In
both verses, eating what is unlawfully earned is known as eating the fire.
Although it looks like a delicious bite today; it will show its inherent nature
as fire in the Hereafter. There are the words of the Glorious Existence which
has willed and created the beings, the Jinns, the angels, the heavens, and men
and women. He is the one who sees sins as being fire while we see a bad act as
being a pleasant one. He sees the Fire of Hell blazing brightly while we do not
even feel the heat. In the Hereafter, fire shall blaze from the eyes for looking
at forbidden scenes; the ears for listening to forbidden sounds; the tongues for
swearing, gossiping or vain talk; the stomach for eating what is unlawfully
earned; from the lust for fornication, masturbating or gay acts; the hands for
oppressing, cheating, deceit, forging signatures, corrupt writing; and feet for
going to forbidden parties. The owner of these body parts shall suffer tortures
from which he cannot escape.
O'
heads of the households, protect your family and yourself from such a fire which
is a result of committing sins. Adhere to divine piety in all aspects of life.
Do not let this life's few days of temporary pleasure, or wealth which may be
lost, cause you to suffer from eternal torture in Hell, whose fuel is man
himself. Stone is one of the materials which can burn. You all know coal is a
hard substance with high heat production capability, and a long burning time.
For millions of years, rocks and lava have been burning at a high pressure such
that at times they appear as a volcano. The flowing lava will burn and destroy
everything in its path. This fire does not end, and as noted by the Holy Quran,
it will cover all the earth, and put aflame all the seas.
When
the oceans boil over with a swell; [Holy Quran: Takwir: 81:6]
This
is a fact which scientists have now discovered. One day in the future, the earth
will turn into a ball of fire.
One
day the Earth will be changed to a different Earth, [Holy Quran: Abraham 14:48]
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Thus
considering the internal conditions of the Earth being a sea of molten rocks and
lava, and the future of the Earth as a ball of fire, we can better understand
the traditions which state that Hell and all its stages exist here on Earth. On
that day, men and rocks will be the fuel for the fire. The combustible materials
in the Earth are the rocks and the lava which may become eternal if God wills,
as man which can become eternal if He wills. Then the family and its head should
pay close attention to the following divine words.
O
ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire .... [Holy Quran:
Tahrim 66: 6]
It
is not easy to deal with the fire managers being angry angels. The residents of
Hell are weak and there is no escape for them. Base people have a base place in
Hell. The Hell that is on this Earth, whose fuel is rocks and men, whose
managers are angry and harsh, whose torture is all-encompassing, burdensome,
burning and ever-lasting. The residents of Hell neither die nor do they have a
desirable life.
In
which they will then neither die nor live. [Holy Quran: A'la 87:13]
A Scented Heaven
When
the head of the household encourages his family members to do their obligatory
religious duties, and abstain from doing physical, financial or moral wrong
acts, then he has saved himself and his family from the Fire of Hell. Their road
towards heaven will be paved. The Heaven which is near the lote-tree, its width
being similar to that of the Earth and all the heavens.
Near
the lote-tree beyond which none may pass:Near it is the Garden of Abode. [Holy
Quran: Najm: 53:14-15]
It
is clear that the above verse points out to a vast universe, so vast that the
divine Heaven which is the same width as the Earth and all the heavens is a part
of it. The Holy Quran instructs all people to become adorned with faith, good
deeds and a good temper; and rush towards Heaven:
Be
quick in the race for forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Garden whose width
is that (of the whole) of the heavens and of the Earth, prepared for the
righteous, [Holy Quran: Al-i-Imran: 3:133]
Dear
readers, beware that sins are savings which you take with you to Hell, while
faith, worship and serving the people are savings which you take with you to
Heaven. Protect yourselves and the family members from saving for Hell, and
encourage them to put things aside for Heaven. Your responsibility as the head
of the household is a heavy one. Take the Prophet (Pbuh) as a model for your
behavior with your wife, children and servants. Then you may be secure from the
torture of the Hereafter, and may reach the eternal blessing of God, being the
lote-tree leaves. The Prophet (Pbuh) was the best husband and father. He did not
go to any extremes in kindness, love and affection, actions and behavior and was
moderate in all respects. He was friendly and kind with them, and also
admonished them regarding their religious duties, God's worship and the fear of
the punishment of the Hereafter. He treated women as women, and acted like a
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child when he was dealing with children. He was a light of guidance and an
example of politeness, nobility, morality, belief in the unity of God, and God's
worship.
Four Important Duties
Several
important duties of the head of the household have been mentioned in what
follows. These help protect the family members from the fire.
1-
Invite them to obey God. The head of the household should invite all members of
his family to obey God's orders which are issued to improve our life in this
world and the Hereafter. He should invite them in such a manner that it is not
difficult for them to follow. It should be said kindly, so that the wife and the
children become interested in obeying God, and consider this to be of the
highest priority. I have tested this at home and it was useful. You should try
it too. I am sure you will benefit from it. When your children start to obey
God, you should encourage them, give them a prize, and hug them. Thus they will
get used to obeying God. Woman too should readily accept their husband's call to
obey God, so that the children learn to obey God.
2-
Teach them about their religious duties. The head of the household should teach
his family their religious duties, part of which is described in books on
Islamic jurisprudence, Islamic ethics and in the practical treatise of Muslim
scholars. If he cannot do this himself, he should take them to the mosque and
religious ceremonies, or invite religious scholars to his house, so that his
family members receive some training about their religious duties. It may be
difficult for some people to read, yet understand the practical treaties of
Muslim scholars. In this case, the children should be sent to classes so they
learn about their religious duties near the time of maturity.
3-
Instruct them to avoid doing what is considered to be bad. It is incumbent upon
the head of the household to admonish the members of his family against wrongful
acts and sins, and to eliminate any grounds for commiting sins at home.
4-
Encourage them to do good deeds. It is incumbent upon the head of the household
to encourage the members of his family to do good deeds such as charity;
humbleness,;respecting the elderly; helping to strengthen people's friendship;
saying what is right; seeking what is right; and whatever is considered to be a
good deed.
The
late Islamic scholar Allameh Majlesi has said that following these four
guidelines is a sure way to protect one and his family from the Fire of Hell.
Working for God's pleasure as such is extremely rewarding. When the Prophet (Pbuh)
decided to dispatch the Commander of the Faithful to invite the people of Yemen
to God's way, he told him: I swear by God that should God guide even just one
person through your efforts, it is better for you than whatever the sun sets and
rises on. [Bihar al-Anwar, v.21, p.361]
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What
a good deal, and how profitable a business it is to gain such a reward for
guiding the wife and the children by being a good teacher! This reward is in
addition to that gained by going to work to earn your living by lawful means.
Such heads of household will receive a double reward; one for providing the
material necessities of their family members and one for providing the spiritual
necessities.